


The Truth

by SkyFireForever



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexuality, Canon Asexual Character, Coming Out, Fix-It, Fluff, Love, M/M, Post-Canon, Preemptive Fix-It, Sex-Repulsed Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:42:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29295357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkyFireForever/pseuds/SkyFireForever
Summary: Jon put off coming out to Martin until he no longer could.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Comments: 3
Kudos: 125





	The Truth

It was over. It was all finally over. The apocalypse had ended and somehow, miraculously, they had survived. They had made it out. Jon could hardly believe it. 

It hadn’t been easy, but Jon would rather not think about what they had gone through to fix things. It didn’t matter now. All that mattered was where they went from here. 

Jon and Martin got a little flat together and settled into a routine. It was nice. Jon was permitted to sleep in, always waking up to a mug of warm tea on the nightstand. The two of them would go on walks in the park together, holding hands and watching people’s dogs run by. Everyone else having forgotten the horrors that they had gone through. 

Jon was weak at first, his connection to the Eye severed. He struggled to get around, was tired all of the time, and simple tasks exhausted him. But he got used to it. Some days were easier than others, but he learned to accept that this chronic fatigue was a part of him. It was something he could live with. 

Martin was always doting on him, making sure that he had everything he needed without being smothering. He would take note of how Jon reacted to things, checking in to see if he needed to rest if things appeared to be taking too much of a toll on him. It was nice. Everything was nice.

There was only one problem. 

Jon still hadn’t told Martin that he was asexual. 

He’d meant to. He really had. He’d meant to tell him back when they were staying at the safehouse and their relationship had just begun. It just hadn’t seemed like the right time. They hadn’t gotten to the point where Martin asked for sex yet, so Jon was just waiting for it to come up naturally. 

But then the apocalypse happened and that changed everything. 

Martin had been too stressed out and afraid and busy to ask Jon for sex during the literal apocalypse and Jon figured that it wasn’t the right time to bring it up. Talking about something as trivial as sex just felt wrong when so many people were suffering. 

But now the apocalypse was over and they had won. 

And Jon was still avoiding the topic. 

He didn’t want to bring it up immediately after the apocalypse ended, as he honestly hadn’t thought of it. Plus, they both needed time to recover. It just wasn’t the right time.

And after things settled into a sense of normalcy? Well, at that point, Jon was just scared. 

What if Martin didn’t want an asexual partner? What if Martin thought sex was his reward for saving the world? What if he left Jon after all they had been through together? 

It was a terrifying idea. So Jon just avoided the topic. He didn’t mention it and hoped that maybe Martin just wouldn’t mention it either. Maybe they could go their entire lives without having that conversation. 

Of course Jon wasn’t that lucky. 

Jon was laying in bed with a book held open, his eyes travelling across the page. It was an interesting book that he’d found himself quite invested in. He hardly noticed when Martin crawled into bed beside him until the other man started kissing his neck. 

Jon’s eyes slipped shut and he made a satisfied hum in the back of his throat. “And what are you doing?” He asked, a smile playing at his lips. 

“Kissing you,” Martin responded with a fond look in his eyes. “Being close to you.” 

Jon slipped his bookmark into his book and set it aside. “Is that so?” 

“Yup!” Martin pulled his boyfriend into his lap, peppering his face with kisses until Jon barked out a laugh. “You’re a very hard person to separate myself from.” His hands travelled down his back until they rested just over Jon’s ass. There was a moment of hesitation before he squeezed. 

Jon stilled, looking down at Martin with wide eyes. 

“Is this okay?” Martin asked, nervousness creeping into his voice. “I know we’ve never discussed our physical boundaries or anything.” He swallowed. “But if you wanted to- that is, if you’re willing- I want to sleep with you,” he blurted out. “As in sex. I know we’ve waited this long, but I’m very attracted to you and I can’t say I’ve never thought about it. It just never felt like the right time, but everything’s okay now and-” He cut himself off and sucked in a deep breath. “I think it’s the right time.” 

Jon felt very much like a deer in the headlights. He opened and closed his mouth several times, not knowing what to say. He felt his chest tighten and his breath catch and he just couldn’t get the words out. Martin wanted to have sex with him. But Jon didn’t want to have sex with Martin. He slowly pulled away, moving Martin’s arms from around him. He crawled away from his boyfriend and sat with his knees pulled up to his chest. 

“Martin, I’m sorry,” he said quietly. 

“No! No no no. No need to apologize,” Martin hurried to get the words out. “You’re not ready and that’s okay. We should have discussed it more before I sprang this on you. I’ll be here when you are ready and-”

“Martin,” Jon cut him off. “It’s not a matter of me being ready.” He felt tears rise into his eyes, fully prepared for Martin to reject him after what he was going to say. This was it. This was the end of his and Martin’s careful romantic buildup. 

Martin had a confused expression on his face, like a startled puppy. “Jon? Jon, are you  _ crying?”  _ His voice conveyed his alarm. “Jon, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” he reached out to pull Jon close, but Jon shook his head. 

“No. Martin, I’m not-” He took a breath. “I’m never going to want to have sex with you. I’m asexual. Sex-repulsed. I don’t enjoy sex with anyone.” He closed his eyes tightly. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I’m sorry. I just didn’t know how. I didn’t want to lose you.” 

There was a long moment of silence and Jon prepared for the disappointment, the anger, the negative emotion that clarified that Martin was leaving for good. 

“Oh, Jon.” Martin’s voice was so soft, so gentle. It made Jon recoil further. “Jon, you’re not going to lose me.” 

Jon slowly opened his eyes, blinking away the tears. “But-”

“Come here.” This time, when Martin pulled him into his arms, Jon didn’t pull away. “Jon, sex isn’t why I entered this relationship. We’ve been together for god knows how long without that being a part of our relationship and we’ll go on without it.” 

With a sniffle, Jon wiped his eyes. “But you want sex. You want that in a relationship.” 

“Yes, I do,” Martin admitted. “But I want you more.” He sighed. “I won’t pretend that I’m not a little disappointed. You’re very attractive and I’ve thought about having sex with you for a long time, but I’m not about to make you uncomfortable just to get what I want.” 

Jon’s heart sank. “But you won’t be happy without it.” 

“What makes you think that?” Martin cupped his face. “I’m so happy every moment that I spend with you. You make me so happy. With or without sex.” 

Jon swallowed. “Thank you.” 

“There’s no need to thank me.” He kissed his head. “I love you, Jon.”

“I love you too.”


End file.
